Tuesday, August 12, 2014

Study Finds 95% of Mid Players Win their Lane

BERLINA recent study performed by Hurmboldt University has found that over 95% of all DOTA2 players who venture into middle lane win their lane. This theory, which has now been confirmed by scientists, contradicts the conventional knowledge which states that every lane must have a winner and a loser.

"Although we found it difficult to believe at first", a researcher at Hurmboldt said, "it turns out that even if your hero dies multiple times in the middle lane, you may have still been winning mid before or even after that point". The study, which sampled replays from around the world, found a surprisingly high amount of consistency among players.


The definition of 'winning mid' is a hot topic for everyone except mid players, who always win their lane.


"I didn't lose mid", a frustrated 0-11-2 Shadow Fiend said in an interview after feeding the enemy tinker for the ninth time, "I was doing fine until they ganked me. I won mid". While around 30% of players concede that they were only winning mid up until a certain point, a whopping 67% maintain that even though it's 30 minutes into the game and they still haven't done anything but feed, that they definitely still won the lane.

"I was winning so hard, he couldn't do anything", said Peter, a Lion player who randomed his hero and went mid despite his team having no lane support, "but then he got one bullshit hook off on me and from that point I couldn't do shit; but I still won the lane". Peter went on to go 3-13-2 while the enemy Pudge player went beyond godlike. His teammates, who were annihilated by the roaming Pudge for the rest of the game, found comfort in the fact that although they had lost horribly, their mid had definitely won his lane.

4 comments:

  1. > We need wards!
    Fuckin' no support!
    Cyka blyat!
    I was winning!

    ReplyDelete
  2. that's fucking retarded bro obviously you don't play mid

    ReplyDelete